if the apocalypse comes

[JaJDoo]

knowing C++ wouldn't really help me now would it?
darn.. should have learned more survival skills....

are you prepared?

[Zonder]

I'm sure you'll be glad of all that paper in the C++ books

[warmi]

knowing C++ wouldn't really help me now would it?
darn.. should have learned more survival skills....

are you prepared?

I am kind of like ESR in this regard ... I got my trusty Glock 17 at home which I think, very much counts as a survival tool.

[JaJDoo]

but do you have enough ammo?
you know, when the apocalypse starts there will be a lot of armed robbers and bandits, and you'll need to hunt. i don't think a handgun is good for hunting tool..

so, we got lots of c++ paper for fire, and a handgun; i think i have a shovel, so we can kill mutants at close quarters and than dig a grave to berry them so they don't regenerate health. what now?

[koirat]

what now?

Just don't forget your pills.

[JaJDoo]

funny thing is that in Hebrew you say the same word for bullets and pills

[koirat]

Lol.
That must have been natural born talent.

[xavier]

If the apocalypse comes, it will be brought on by spammers...

[Zonder]

If the apocalypse comes, it will be brought on by spammers...

The wrath of xavier

[Kojack]

My katana won't run out of bullets.

[betajaen]

According to the Zombie Survival guide (for which I have a copy). The best place to hold out is either a sea-fort or a castle and I live less than two miles from both.

I've also played enough Left 4 Dead and Fallout 3 to make your head spin.

So I win.

[JaJDoo]

lets go over some possible apocalyptic scenarios:
1. religious apocalypse:
i don't think there's any way to prepare for this one, you are either in the right religion or not; since we cant know which deity will bring the apocalypse first, we cant know to which religion to turn to prior. its like defcon - the first one to launch the missiles saves the most of his own citizens. which brings us to the second possible scenario:

2. nuclear apocalypse:
the best way to prepare will be to move to a remote region where the nukes will never land (like central russia.. whats in there anyway?) if you're not, you will at the very least need a shovel and a hand gun. if you have enough patience
and pills. anti-radiation pills.

3. flood apocalypse:
surprisingly, a shovel will be again be useful: it can turn into a paddle. i think noahs solution is unrealistic - a boat this size will probably crash into a peak before the flood ends, but a smaller boat will be drown to easily. its probably a myth..

4. zombie apocalypse:
again, a shovel is the first thing you need. anyone who ever fought a zombie knows its easier to bring down a zombie will a melee weapon than a handgun. unless you have explosives or a minigun; but they have a quantity/ammo limit.

5. alien occupation apocalypse:
hazard suit and a crowbar (or a shovel, but its less compact)

all in all, a shovel seems to be a valuable tool in most scenarios.

[Olemars]

(like central russia.. whats in there anyway?)

Nuclear missile silos, prime target of any first strike. So perhaps not the best choice of habitat, although you'll be more used to year-round winter well in advance of everyone else.

all in all, a shovel seems to be a valuable tool in most scenarios.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b60OZhrTB6o

[JaJDoo]

i knew a shovel was the right choice.
its like the apocalypse equivalent of towels.

My katana won't run out of bullets.

if you roll Olemars video to exactly 4:00 minutes, you will see the shovel beats katana (a guy in a car depended himself from a katana wielding bandit by using it as a shield)

perhaps not the best choice of habitat

well what about Canada?

[Kojack]

The guy sitting in his car with his shovel shield may be able to block some katana swings, but let's see how he deals with a few Cold Steel special forces shovels flying his way.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0McQ-cQmUZA

Or if I was the guy with the sword, I'd just stab in the window instead of swing, or walk around to the other side to where the door was open.

For a zombie apocalypse, I'd go for something like a two handed panga machete. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SYnXOrg2xk4
Or a polypropylene baseball bat. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5w85mkLwICE
You don't have to worry about it getting damaged, smash heads as much as you want.

For nuclear apocalypse, I'd want to stock up on Potassium Iodide tablets, some detection equipment, and a large supply of bolts.

For religious apocalypse, I'm pretty much screwed. So I might as well worry about things with a greater chance of happening, like zombies.

Alien invasion, a shovel is much better than a crowbar. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lpjDaDAchdM

[stoneCold]

In case you missed the open letter that was hung out at your local town hall...

Zombie-Apocalypse Survival Rules:

Rule #1: Cardio
Rule #2: Beware of bathrooms
Rule #3: Seatbelts
Rule #4: Double Tap
Rule #6: Skillet
Rule #12: Bounty
Rule #15: Bowling Ball
Rule #29: The Buddy System
Rule #33: Swiss Army Knife

Regards,
the Zombie-Hunter of your choice

[JaJDoo]

ok, i just remembered another apocalypse.
i just saw the second Evangelion movie.

i saw the original series; i saw a lot of other stuff..

but this movie..
my brain started melting during the last minutes of the movie. its a black hole of WTF.
at least that kind apocalypse is pretty.. lots a colors... and giant robots..

problem is there absolutely no chance of survival.. we all turn to soup.
---

back to shovels shall we?

[reptor]

My katana won't run out of bullets.

By the way,

did you know some Japanese sword-makers hardened the metal by dipping it into real human blood during the process of making the sword? I read it from a book describing how Japanese swords were made back in the good old days...

The point of dipping it into real human blood was apparently to make the metal "get used to" the conditions it would be exposed to in its intended use.

Could be a myth! Or a joke by the author of the book - the book is sort of a semi-serious one as it is sort of an autobiography of the author but written so that names of people are 'modified' and so on.

[Kojack]

ok, i just remembered another apocalypse.
i just saw the second Evangelion movie.

No kind of shovel is going to save us from a giant girl turning the world's population to liquid.

[JaJDoo]

actually i saw the new movie (not end of evangelion)

this one:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4vM_Ub231Vw

[Kojack]

actually i saw the new movie (not end of evangelion)

Ok, that's the 4th movie (although I'm pretty sure there was another one released in cinemas which remixed the first 2, so You Can (Not) Advance could be considered the 5th movie). I haven't seen the most recent 2, End Of Evangelion was the last one I saw. By that point I'd become completely annoyed with Shinji, I don't think I could watch any more, although the trailers for You Are (Not) Alone and You Can (Not) Advance look cool.

[JaJDoo]

tell you the truth, the two new ones ( 2 out of 4 of the so called "rebuild of evangelion"; 'you are (not) alone' and 'you can (not) advance') are quite awesome.
they changed some things (especially the design and order of the angels- most have sachiel faces now, which is scary). most of the first movie is the 3 first battles; so you can watch it and be struck with awe before you start noticing shinji. Ramiel battle is so much better now...

they also changed some story weirdness and inconsistencies. kaji's "garden talk in middle of battle" with shinji always bothered me- now it happens in a bit more logical time.

.......and they don't dance to kill a twin angel this time..

[stealth977]

1. religious apocalypse: Well, its unlikely, against the rules of nature, but if it happens, its a good thing since we now can be sure there is an "afterlife"

2. nuclear apocalypse: Semi-unlikely, the countries which have them are not fools (actually they are, but not that fool enough, including mine )

3. flood apocalypse: Very very unlikely, at least i will not be able to see it...

4. zombie apocalypse: Impossible, there is yet no virus capable of re-animating the whole body...

5. alien occupation apocalypse: Thats more likely, its only when it happens that we can understand if a shovel is enough or not

That said, more likely scenario is a massive world war 3 and contrary to what most think, it wont be between developed countries. The most likely situation is that the "poor" and "hungry" will march on to "rich" and "fat" and that will be outta "necessity". One scenario says that in not so far future, hordes of "poor" people of south (africa??) may march on to europe.

I do not know if it will happen, but, as an economist, the most wealth you can accumulate equals to WORLD_TOTAL_WEALTH - WEALTH_OF_POOREST_%51_OF_THE_WORLD if you go beyond that point, the poorest %51 will invalidate money and march on to you And, world is quite close to passing that limit...

[JaJDoo]

1. religious apocalypse: Well, its unlikely, against the rules of nature, but if it happens, its a good thing since we now can be sure there is an "afterlife"

what do you mean UNLIKELY?! are you saying religion is MADE UP?! next you'll say evolution is real and the world is more than 5000 years old!!!
oh wait, that's all true.

2. nuclear apocalypse: Semi-unlikely, the countries which have them are not fools (actually they are, but not that fool enough, including mine )

so you are saying politicians/tyrants generally think forward? that's rare...
you seen the size of 'tzar bomba'?
which reminds me... a few days ago my "parliament" (where politician go to shout at each other) disapproved of a tiny increase to the minimal wage, while passing a notion to increase the parliament members' wage by thousands of NIS...

3. flood apocalypse: Very very unlikely, at least i will not be able to see it...

asteroid + (earth's oceans) != monster tsunami ?
which reminds me i haven't mentioned an asteroid apocalypse.

4. zombie apocalypse: Impossible, there is yet no virus capable of re-animating the whole body...

*YET*................ MUGHAHAHAHA
what about necromancers?! you cant rule THAT out!

5. alien occupation apocalypse: Thats more likely, its only when it happens that we can understand if a shovel is enough or not

shovel can bring down a spaceship no problem. just watch OLemars Chinese military shovel movie and you can see shovels can do anything.

[Klaim]

Does this thread prevent or invoque apocalypse?

That is the question.